Building towers and on the lookout for treasures

Building towers, fighting dragons and on the look-out for the treasure.

To distract him and get him away from the door she offers him a green ball. It's one of those big yoga-balls. At times the big green ball is enough to get his attention, to get his mind off things. He likes kicking the ball, likes watching it bounce she told me before. But today he shakes his head and tries to open the door again. 'Let's go and see if we can build a tower with the building blocks' she tries while taking him by the hand. He looks at her, nodds and then repeats her words. 'Building blocks' he says while making his way to the room.

R. sits in a chair and frowns when I come in. She has seen me once and seems a bit confused..should she be afraid and start crying or can she trust the others in the group, who don't seem to think I am scary and greet me friendly. I carefully approach her and give her a colorful triangular shaped stuffed toy, her favorite toy. There's a little bell inside and the sound of it makes her laugh.

It's time to eat. The smell of the warm meal fills the hallway. Some of them react with great enthusiasm, while others make a face and complain: time flew by fast and they were still engaged in play. Pirates were still on the look out for treasures while builders were busy building houses and high towers. At the lunch table a few sit in special chairs to prevent them from falling, but other sit on their own. M. can eat the soup without help, but L. needs a bit of assistance with food: drinking he can do perfectly well with that special cup he has.

Just a few moments from the past few days and they could all be stories from the day care center I work at, but not all of them are. They could be, but there not. Last week I started my new job as an activity coordinator at an old age home here in The Hague. The people who live on the floor I am working on are all grown -ups. Grown-ups in different stages of their life, but all of them with dementia. Some of them are young people, people who 'got' the sympthoms of this disease at an early age..before they reached 65. And eventhough the majority comes across as old people when sitting in a chair..one look at their healthy partner or 30 something kids makes it painfully clear that we're indeed dealing with a group of people who are far to young to forget who they are or were.
But on this floor there're not only young people with dementia, there're old people as well.
Last Friday I worked on the day care with kids in the morning and at the old age house in the afternoon. The age difference between these two groups could not have been bigger. In the morning I was crawling on the floor to put a railway together, singing songs and cuddling 2 year olds and in the afternoon I sat next to an 92 year old lady, holding her hand and listening to a incomprehensible story about her childhood. A age difference of 90 years...quite a lot, if you ask me.

The people in the old age house live their because they cannot live at home anymore. Caring nurses and living-room assistents get them out of their beds, wash them and feed them when they 're not able to do it themselves. They cut the bread in small pieces for those who do not have teeth or for those who are having difficulties swallowing. Activities here vary....Joe might still be able to play cards, whereas Amy will try to eat those same cards. For this lady my collegue found a new way of playing Patience..an old computer does the trick. She might not be able to use the sensible mousepad of the laptop, but points out the cards on the screen and enjoys playin a game or two like that.
And one of my tasks will be that...thinking about new ways of stimulating the part of the active brain that is still active or sit down with the residents and their family to come up with activities for their father, mother, sister or brother. Some of the residents join a choir, visit the libary with their partner and paint a bit in the afternoons.

But others are not able to do those things..they sit in silent and stare at something I cannot see. Or they sit and and talk and talk. To sit and listen to his or her story of growing up is part of my job as well. A story of when he was still young, when his parents were still alive and life had just begun. When playing with blocks perhaps was a way to distract him, but more likely was used to stimulate the growing brain, to explore the million possibilities of those simple building blocks..a few blocks together, a wee bit of imagination and those colorful bricks became airplanes, cars, forts for soldiers or castles for princesses.

While writing these words I just finished my fourth day..what do I know about people with dementia, about life in an old age house? I only met a few residents , did not speak with many and am not able yet to put names to all the faces. But first impressions are there and I have shared just a few. Eventhough I have seen sad moments during those days, I have experienced smiles and some loud laughter as well...which is nice.
I just signed my
contract and will be there for three days a week ( 16 hours) for at least 6 months. The remaining hours of the week I try to fill with work at different day care centres ( for children) The last few weeks I have been working a bit on the day care where I used to work before I left for Costa Rica and Nicaragua. It is nice to see the familiar faces of the children and parents, to see that they have grown a lot and developed so well. They are talking, walking and developing at a fast space..great to see. After seeing the eldery in the old age house, I am even more content to be with these wonderful energetic children...they're so alive and ready to tackle the world. Love it!

My last update I wrote on the 5th of December. Back then I thought that I would be in Nicaragua in March to celebrate my 32nd birthday there, but as always plans change...I am still here in La Haya. But that is okay. In the meantime my mom had her surgery and all went well. She recovered soon from the kidney donation operation, but got an infection of her liver and became yellow and had a terrible itch all over....jaudience. She had to go the the doctor a few times to rule out serious liver problems, but in the end it turned out to be 'fine'. I am glad I was there though to help her here and there. She's all better now and as active as ever..if not more active. The person who received her kidney is doing great as well. The first few weeks were hard on him and he had to go back and forth to the hospital, but now he's out and about and feels great. He has more energy and looks great...so mission accomplished I guess!

Well people, I will end this message now..guess it is again quite a lot to read for you. In this message I did not write about Nicaragua or some other far away country, but I will keep you updated...the plans to return are definitly there.
Adios for now
Besitos y abrazos Rebecca